Motherhood is one of the most beautiful, rewarding roles a woman can take on—but it can also be one of the most overwhelming. As moms, we’re told time and again that putting our children first is what makes us “good moms.” And while it’s true that our kids deserve love, attention, and care, this belief often pushes our own dreams, desires, and goals to the bottom of the priority list.

If you’ve ever felt lost in motherhood or like you’re living life on autopilot, you’re not alone. I’m Jessica Erickson, a certified life coach, mom of four, and host of the Dream to Done podcast. 

In this episode, I want to talk about why pursuing your goals as a mom is not just important—it’s essential. Not only for your well-being but for your family’s too.

The “Good Mom” Myth

Growing up, many of us heard that a good mom always puts her kids first. That sounds noble, right? But here’s the problem: our kids are busier than ever. School, sports, music, playdates—they’re constantly on the go. As moms, we’re scheduling, driving, volunteering, and keeping everything running smoothly. By the end of the day, there’s little left for us—time, energy, or even money.

We often think, “My time will come later.” Later, when they’re older. Later, when they start driving. Later, when they move out. But the truth is, that “later” never comes unless we create space for ourselves now.

What Happens When Moms Come Last

Putting yourself last day after day doesn’t just wear you down—it can lead to deep resentment. You might start feeling angry or frustrated with the very people you love the most. And that guilt? It doesn’t help either. I remember moments of skipping breakfast, showing up in stained clothes, or passing up a retreat for myself to spend on a dance competition. These sacrifices felt noble in the moment but left me feeling invisible.

It’s Not You vs. Them

Let me be clear: this isn’t a call for “mom vs. kids.” It’s about including yourself in the equation. It’s about recognizing that when you are working on your goals, everyone wins.

Here’s what I’ve learned from pursuing my own goals:

• I’m happier. When I have something to look forward to or work on, I’m simply a better version of myself.
• My family rises with me. A happier mom sets the tone for the home.
• I set a powerful example. My kids learn more by watching me follow through than by hearing me say “you can do anything.”
• Unexpected blessings happen. When I invest in myself, it often leads to surprising opportunities and joy for the whole family.

The Power of the 12 Trip

One of my favorite traditions was born out of a dream: to take each of my kids on a solo trip when they turned 12. It started with a simple vision during a women’s retreat. I mapped out the next 25 years of our lives to see how old my kids would be during various milestones. It was eye-opening. It reminded me that the perfect time never arrives unless I create it.

So when my daughter turned 12, I made that trip happen—even though schedules were packed and it would have been easier to postpone. The result? A magical day full of roller coasters, laughter, and meaningful conversations. And guess what? While we were gone, my other kids had a blast with their grandparents and my husband enjoyed a rare solo movie date.

Everyone won. Everyone grew. And I was reminded why pursuing your goals is always worth it.

How to Start Pursuing Your Goals Today

You don’t need to take a big trip or make a huge life change to start. Here are some small steps you can take right now:

1. Acknowledge your desires. What do you want? Write it down.
2. Look at the big picture. Map out future milestones using this age milestone cheat sheet.
3. Make a small plan. Pick one thing and schedule time for it this week.
4. Ask for support. You don’t have to do it all alone. Share your goal with someone who can help.
5. Celebrate every win. Progress is progress—even if it’s slow.

You Deserve This

Being a mom is hard work. If no one’s told you today: Thank you for everything you do. For packing the snacks. For organizing the chaos. For loving fiercely. But don’t forget: you matter too.

So let me ask you this: If you had all the time and money in the world, what would you be doing right now?

Start there. Pursue that. And know that I’m always cheering for you.

Want help getting started? DM me on Instagram @jessicaericksoncoaching and tell me your dream.

You can do this. Let’s go from dream to done.